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The lovely blue pristine sky, with patches of clouds in shapes ones imaginative mind could visualise made it look more ethereal and pure. The soft sensuous wind which was blowing was making Maya inhale the purity of the moment and her tender feet wanted to slow her steps. Yet her anxious mind knew that she needed to hurry to the nearest internet café, in the sleepy hamlet of Majuli the only river island which was a place for Maya to be connected to the entire world and people she held dear to her heart. The internet café would be shutting down with the onset of dusk.

She anxiously opens her inbox in her social networking sight and her heart missing a beat what if she is disappointed. But something told her as it always did, that, she will not be sad for her inbox had the mail that she waits so anxiously for the whole day to read and today evening was no different. Her mail was there in her inbox waiting for her. The smile on her face was so serene that its positive vibes moved across the room and it touched all the people in there. Everyone, for reason known to them were all happy and positive together for the moment. Thanks to Maya and her mail in her inbox.

Maya is a modern day woman with a strong mind of her own and after being a dweller on this earth for 37 years, and a marriage of a decade gone wrong, she needed a gateway from all the hustle and bustle of her Mumbai life and heal her soul and find her inner calling which had died down in her last ten years of being married and trying to make it a perfect communion on earth, and her demanding job as a very promising HR Professional.

Maya’s is attractive with a very vibrant and positive smile and an infectious laughter which would engulf everyone near her when she would laugh. Her sensuous lips complimented her beautiful eyes, and her soft spoken nature. When her lips moved to speak it mesmerised everyone. Compliments of how beautiful she looked were always in abundance for her, and it made her feel like a beautiful woman all over again and again. Maya loved the adulation.

Maya’s beautiful mind and soul never allowed her to give up when the going was absolutely looking like a dead end for her. She attributes her beautiful and rational mind to her family lineage and their influence on her.

The last one year’s struggle has its impact on Maya to such an extent that she has lost a lot of weight and the mirror has been desperately trying to reach out to her and tell her the same but cannot not reach Maya. She has completely shut herself from everything.

She moved out of Keshav’s flat her husband and companion for a decade and moved into the studio apartment of Mahira.her first step in moving away from him.

A walk one evening on Marine drive in the evening by the Queens Necklace when it looks the most amazing with Mahira her confidante and true friend since childhood who took out time to fly down from across the globe to be with Maya when she needed her the most, a week spent in almost all the coffee shops in suburban Mumbai, lying awake till morning at Maya’s cosy kitchen counter with mugs of black koffee, and the kitchen table lamp being the only witness to their heart to heart conversation, gave birth to Maya’s desire for a soul cleaning and spiritual retreat.

It took Mahira a week to grill into Maya that life need not come to a standstill and what she needed was a gateway form everything and everyone and be all on her own and move ahead. Mahira had read in a magazine that the river island Majuli in Assam was a beautiful place with lots of serenity and greenery around. She had a secret desire that one day she would visit the place. She brought up the idea with Maya and thanks to google all information how to reach the place and where to stay was all there. It was 4A.M in the morning Mahira had a flight back to Boston in the evening and time was moving like a hurricane... Maya needed to take her break to do her soul searching and coming to terms that she was not the villain for her failure as keshav had over innumerable long debates for nights together made her feel.

The seeing off at the Shivaji International airport was for some strange reason a very satisfying one for Mahira she knew deep down that Maya would come back from her spiritual retreat as a much more wiser and enlightened soul. She offered her silent prayers for her well being. The final boarding call and the last tight hug with Mahira and as Maya watched Mahira disappear amidst the crowd heading for various destinations with different mindsets

That night Maya missed Mahira as her home seemed all silent. She fixed herself a jumbo Tuna sandwich and a hot cup of chocolate to give her company while she planned to work late night to clear of her last assignment and then gear up for her own destination which she herself too was looking ahead quite eagerly.

The early Sunday morning Mumbai was beautiful the drive to the airport made her realise that for the next six months she would miss her city of twelve years.
The flight to Jorhat was on time. Having worked the whole night her tired eyes could no longer be with her, they needed to take rest. So having snuggled in comfortably into her seat with eye shades to shun her completely she drifted into her slumber. The announcement that the flight would be landing in Jorhat shook Maya out of her slumber, she peeped out to see the quiet breathtaking view of Jorhat as the aeroplane made a smooth landing at the quiet airport.

As arranged earlier Mr Gogoi was there waiting with a huge smile and the colourful white and red bordered Assamase Gamocha to welcome his guest for quite sometime in Majuli.

Mr Gogoi and his wife Torulata have been running this home away from home in Majuli. Of late there has been a gradual influx of people from across the globe who would come there for months together on social projects to save the river island from extinction.

The last two months in Majuli has helped Maya to take her first step to liberate herself from her guilt to begin with. The day starts early for Maya an hour of yoga and meditation in the day and a salutation to the Sun God marks the beginning of each of her day. The meditation has helped Maya to rationalise things and her soul seems to breathe in more of fresh air at ease. Maya keeps herself busy by writing poems and working on a book which she has been contemplating for quite sometime.

Writing has become a great source for relieving her inner wounds .Her other source of inspiration to keep up with her writing and not loosing focus goes to Jojo her social networking acquaintance who without her making much of an effort has been quietly becoming her source of comfort level. He, to her surprise turned out to be a companion and friend whom she has been looking for quite unconsciously in her deepest of heart.

. Maya is not sure when was the day but remembers very vividly that pressure at work and then getting back home in the evening after waging a war with the Mumbai evening traffic, and with keshav, very casually but rudely commenting about her not being involved behaviour at home which upsets Maya as it has been for so many years now. But she had no time to brood had to complete her crucial presentation to be made next morning. Latter, at night as she is engrossed in her work at her study in her dark mahogany table, Jojo had unexpectedly popped up at her inbox saying he met her many years back when Maya was still in kolkata at her fathers place visited them with his father. She at that time had not yet moved to Mumbai. He makes a humble request if it was fine with her to get to know each other again after so many years. Genuinely, says he by luck found her while surfing on the social site. She finds him to be honest, and for reasons not very clearly known to her too allows him to be her friend.

In the following days and months she realises that every evening back home from work she would eagerly see if Jojo posted any message and to her delight he used to be waiting for her there patiently with a calm smile . He would ask how her day had been, and Maya, with great ease and negligible inhibition would bare her thoughts to him. Jojo was always there to give that patient hearing but never imposing any suggestion just a friendly advice that cemented their bond as friends. Maya did not want anybody who would impose anything on her, had enough of it both at work and at home but would love an honest opinion when the need rose. Jojo just did that. He was gentle, vibrant, and witty, whenever, he found her to be low while they chatted. His amusing sense of humour always enthralled her. He would share the day’s happenings with her and she would give it a patient hearing never imposing any judgement on it. This was the basic similarity that brought them closer. Maya soon found that he was the perfect friend she had been looking for in so many years. Thankful, to time and destiny, how one fine evening the wish came true without her making much of an effort.

She kept her personal struggle with keshav at a distance from him fearing he would sympathise with her and she was not ready that anybody should do that. He sensed it one night partially while they were chatting but Maya never gave any hint and he never brought that topic up for discussion.

Every evening was a delight for Maya for some time when Jojo would pop up on her screen and they would chat of common interest how the day was spent on both sides, of their similar eating habits, on the same kind of books that they loved to read, or just make fun on lighter issues of life, sharing incidents of a very similar upbringing that kept their friendship growing stronger everyday. Maya always longed for a pure platonic friend like him secretly. Jojo was a few years younger to her but was matured beyond his age and age was never an issue between them. They loved each other’s company and it was a connection that was pure and divine.

It was only when Maya decided to move to Majuli that she told him how things with keshav had gone wrong and how it was so essential for her to take full control of her life again. Jojo just said ‘listen to your heart and look ahead in life’. Not once sounding to be sympathising with her. Maybe he also practises the same belief and does not allow anybody to sympathise with him too when the going gets tough for him at times.

He would every day find out how her meditation and her book was progressing, and share small anecdotes with her which always seemed humorous. By 9 in the evening Maya would retire to her bed quite content with having spent a fruitful day.

Basking in the December winter sun outside her small cottage which had now become so much her home, she realised that she had almost finished 5 months in Majuli, and looking back at the 5 months she has realised that the gateway was such a healing process for her. She now had no regrets for her decision of moving away from Keshav. Her book was coming to an end. For quite sometime she had been struggling for an ending to her book and that morning sitting outside in her cottage she could visualise how she would love her book to end.

The day was further special as after one year of knowing her inbox friend he was finally coming down to Majuli from the remote Tea estate where he has been working and giving her constant company through the inbox, to meet her before she would leave for Mumbai in the coming few weeks. By 12 in the afternoon Tarulata the owner of her cottage made a sumptuous Assamases lunch of sour fish curry, potato mash , rice and green sag for her and her friend. At 1 in the afternoon Jojo arrived and Maya felt that she had known him since ages. They spoke, eat to their hearts content and laughed for almost every small thing. The three hours came to an end without them realising and it was time for Jojo to say adieu for the day.
With his car slowly moving into oblivion Maya realised that it was a friendship cemented for life.

The next two weeks Maya was totally engrossed in giving final touch to her book and learning the last bit of Assamese from Tarulata.It was a Saturday evening and one of her best saturday night spent being totally content with her inner self with Mr Gogoi and Tarulta laughing and eating a simple Assamese dinner. Winding up all her belongings in time Maya says her last goodnight to her guardians who looked after her for six months and was always there when she was low, retires to her bed in her last night at Majuli.

The morning is bright and birds chirping everywhere, Maya is dressed in a black and white salwar kamez hair washed and with a light dab of kajal in her eyes she looked like a 30 year old young beautiful vibrant girl ready to conquer the world. She sits behind the car with tarulata and Mr gogoi on the wheels the drive to Jorhat airport begins. The journey back will always be memorable for Maya she is taking back good memories of the place and Majuli will always remain dear to her.

At the jorhat airport Jojo was waiting with a beautiful bunch of mixed roses and choclates by now knows that they are one of her favourites. They hug each other and both thankful to God and offering silent prayers for having found a true friend in each other. He promises to meet her in Mumbai whenever he can, and Maya just smiles.
Inside the aircraft as it soars high and climbs towards the blue sky, Maya is all ready to face her real world once again. She mutters to herself ‘Mumabi I am back’.

Hope and Faith

The true appreciation of life cannot be measured if we do not experience ups and downs both. These are life’s way of telling us or rather showing us how to be better human beings and be always positive and accept our shortcomings, learn from them and move on henceforth.
Accepting downs of life is not always an easy way to tread. Mixed emotions engulf the thought process. This is when we need to have a super control on our mind. Mind is the place where every thought process has its origin, and also its final destination.
It is on us how we look at life’s experiences. Every experience has its story to narrate and a moral to conclude. It’s entirely on us how we look at the moral and what do we learn and how open are we to take in everything which could be a mixture of both sweet and bitter.
I on a very personal level have always taken every experience of life seriously for reflecting on it and realising that hope and faith in self and the Almighty are the only two powerful words
that keeps the wheel of life moving forward till it finally reaches its destination and comes to a final halt.

Slim and Trim

Everybody wants to be in shape. It makes u feel good from within,one is more confidant at the work place.
Being thin is the happening thing at the moment.Member of a high profile gym, eating right, and organic stuff , is the most commonly used vocabulary amongst most people.
Everybody wants the best in life and works hard at achieving it.
I am no different from the rest. I have been waging this war against my weight for how long is hard to tell.
But somehow victory has really not come my way.
I dream to loose some 30kg in this lifetime. At times inner motivation is at peak at times at it's lowest. maybe this variation and not being constant could be my weakness.
It has become an obsession with me looking for information on google on the various ways of losing weight.
Now my goal is to loose weight only by brisk walking and eating in moderation.
Staying in Agra, and the weather at present is displaying it's most bad behaviour. yet i drag myself out of my home almost every evening to meet my target - 30kg.
As of now i believe that walking religiously will help me meet my expectations.
Cannot predict tomorrow maybe i will still keep walking....... or might just give up.

Celebrating Rongali Bihu

It’s that time of the year once again....... It’s April and Rongali Bihu is there.
According to the Hindu calendar it is the beginning of a new year.
Being a hardcore axomiya(that is how Assamese is pronounced) Rongali Bihu makes me feel so at ease from deep within, that time of the year when promises are made and some broken, the cycle continues.
The Bihu folksong which every shop plays makes the market look so festive.
The dark chocolate red colour of Jetuka(mehendi) and it’s smell is so nostalgic to me even today.
My aaita from my maternal side always said we need to apply the fresh paste of the jetuka leaves on the night of Goru Bihu(Where cows are worshipped) the first day of Bihu, on our both thumb nails, and toe nails. It would be applied then covered with a plastic foil followed by a clean white muslin cloth and left overnight. We would get up excited the next day to see the beautiful colour that the jetuka leaves have left behind.
The meaning and essence of Rongali Bihu has evolved since my childhood. Today far from home I have many wonderful memories to rewind back at every stage of my life celebrating Bihu, it has also quite unconsciously been having a different charm and meaning at this stage of my life. The transition and meaning has gradually moved on as I have also moved on from one stage of life to another without me making any conscious effort.
Celebrating Bihu during the 80’s as a child. My early memories of celebrating Rongali Bihu goes back to Dikom a small place about 12 kms ahead of Dibrugarh and short of Chabuwa. Bihu meant new clothes to wear, getting ready for the first day of Bihu wherein cows are worshipped.((Goru Assamese word for cow). A paste of maah and halodhi( paste of urad dal and turmeric) is made and a wonderful and loving scrub is given to the cows.
My parents at that time had the privilege to be proud owners of a handful of huge wonderful Jersey( a particular breed of cows)cows. The ritual would follow and I and my sister would also take an active part in it, lovingly we would smear a little paste on their foreheads. We even named each cow I remember one name even now lali. The celebration of Goru Bihu would not have been so wonderful had it not been for the passionate, dedicated, and honest helpers like Thaga and Ramchokol. Such human beings are not to be found anymore these days. The species is on the verge of extinction. Many years have passed by. I was a young girl not even in my teens when I last met them maybe more than two decades. Thaga has grown very old and so has Ramchokol, I take this opportunity to remember them and appreciate their hard work and loyalty towards us. God bless them and their families always. Then would come the trips to Xiboxagor( sivsagar) and Jorhat, home of my maternal and paternal grandparents.
Mamu and Piti my grandparents (piti is no more now) along with Iran mama would wait on the verandah anxiously for us to arrive with huge smiles on their face. Then to Jorhat there again my paternal aaita in her frail and petit figure would be there to welcome us. She would be ready with her special menu of Bihu food, her food was amazingly mouth-watering simple authentic Assamese vegetarian food cooked on firewood.
Celebrating Bihu as a young teenage girl in the 90’s. The core essence remained the same, getting new clothes, visiting grandparents. Most of mine and my younger sister’s teenage years were spent at Jorhat ( I have been mentioning my sister quite often because she was always an integral part of those growing up years and continues to be even now, we were and are like soul mates and the closest and only confidants in this world. I have never known life without her.) We were growing up to be big girls we got choosier about the new clothes that we would get, would not like visiting every household with parents apart from grandparent’s house, and would love to spend more time with friends. The gradual transition, we now wanted the jetuka to be just not smeared on our palms but wanted patterns and designs. Unlike in other parts of India where mehendi is applied with various designs in Assam during Bihu it is just smeared evenly on the palms no designs
Would look forward for the many husoris( group dancers) who would visit every household blessing each member of the family with good health and prosperity. The Bihu dance which the husori troop would perform at every household in the neighbourhood was so mesmerising even non dancers like me would be tempted to join them such is the rhythm of Bihu songs. We did not get to see this much as a child in Dikom.
It is similar to the carol singers during Christmas which visits every house blessing each member with, loads of happiness.
Celebrating Bihu as an adult now. With 35 years behind me the flavour of Bihu is very different. When I look back I remember that every Bihu was just a time to be happy, be in the best of attire, and have loads of authentic Assamese food Jolpan, doi, pitha, tilor larur, narikolor laru, luchi bahji..... The list can just be getting bigger and bigger. It was understood that we need to be perpetually happy during April month as Bihu is there. It was taken for granted; honestly enough did not value it much. We tend to value less, moment we take things for granted. But why am I giving an explanation that is how life is designed to be, carefree, and just enjoying life as young growing up individuals as it comes by thinking that life always would be the same every time. I guess this is needed too otherwise when the going gets tough along with age and responsibilities we need those carefree childhood memories to cling on to and to bring a smile on to our face.
Bihu at this stage of my life is more of being thank full to the Almighty for blessing and protecting my dear ones from everything and keeping us all sound. Thank full that the bumpy roads that we all faced while completing our journey from last Rongali Bihu to this were not that rough that we could not get up and move on. Many are not fortunate to see this rongali Bihu like I and my loved ones have been this time. Feel blessed and appreciate that life has been very kind and just. I could have asked for nothing more than this.
On the larger canvass would love to see this planet to be more peaceful, that we respect each other and co exist peace fully. I pray and hope that a few handful of people who have strayed from the most basic understanding that we need to respect each other’s life has a self realisation and an enlightenment that the venom of hatred and intolerance that has been spread, is only getting deeper and deeper. We would all be the losers in the long run. We need to begin fresh for there is still hope.
Our time spent on this planet is just a journey our final destination is never this place we all need to go up and be accountable for all our deeds in front of that supreme power. We would definitely not want to cut a sorry figure there. Up there, we are all alone with our good and bad deeds, nobody to pass the blame on too which we are so used to doing on this earth.
Things that have still not changed on this Rongali bihu is that I still feel excited about wearing new clothes, love eating pitha, khurma, tilor laru.
I guess this should never change under any circumstances.
Wishing everyone a very happy Rongali Bihu.

Life moves on

Lossing someone close in the family makes us realise that we need to love and nurture every relationship with complete honesty and love to the best of our ability.
Lossing a parent is the toughest thing one can come to terms with.
The pain is sharp yet we need to move on for the soul never dies and is amongst us somewhere. we just need to feel the presence.
Uncle, (Brigadier Verma) you will be missed by all your soft spoken nature, will always be alive where ever you are.
God give strength and blessings to the family to carry forward life henceforth without uncle.

mixed emotions

TANNU my brother in law or rather my little brother he is more of a brother then a Bro in law. Brig verma tannu's father is very very unwell.
Just hoping against hope that he bounces back and is there to play with his granchildren,spend quality time with his sons and daughter inlaws.
Had i the power to change one thing on this planet i would ask that no body should ever fall sick.
The world would be such a happy place then.
It is said that life and death are the the two eternal truths.We all have to go someday.But how do we account for all the attachments that we build up in our lifetime. to let go everything is so very tough.
Uncle might be there among us or he might leave, the feeling is very sinking.Deep down at some corner of my heart i am praying that there should be a miracle and all are once again happy at pune home.

Life hain toh Jahaan Hain

The very first evidence of a new life forming in all mammals is first felt by the female counterpart, in whose womb the life starts growing. Human beings are no exception to it.
After nine months in most cases leaving a few like elephants whose gestation period carries on for 22 months, dogs 63 days, and cats 67 days. The life that is formed makes it’s appearances on this planet. And then the journey continues, as long as its lifespan is there.
The ones who are born without any physical deformities by birth are the lucky ones compared to their counterparts who are challenged for a life time and are challenged in one form or the other.
When we pass by an organisation, for the physically challenged, or see someone on the road, handicapped, the most common reaction for most of us is that of pity. The feeling lasts for a few seconds and then millions of other thoughts like schedules to be met, deadlines to be completed flood our mind and the sight that we had witnessed a few seconds ago passes into oblivion.
We miss out on a very glaring fact of life that somewhere we have just taken our daily existence as something that will be there for eternity.
We take our life and our body for granted. Unlike in many countries in the west where everyone from a very young age is made to realise that we need to love and worship our own body with that much passion and zeal as we love and take care of our material belongings.
A few months back I was reading an article in The Reader’s digest about a victim who had survived the Glasgow bombings in one of the tube station of London. She was alive but with a lot of physical damage to her body, and it took her months to heal and become normal. She had mentioned that she could not turn from one side to the other and lay in the same position for several months. When life was perfectly normal and she lay in bed turning and tossing a million times she had least realised the value of that simple pleasure of turning over the bed and which had given her immense comfort and happiness. The incident moved my soul and I felt that we need to be grateful to that someone Special who controls our very existence. We need to love our body and be grateful to Him on a daily basis for seeing us through without any physical injury and protecting our day to day wellbeing and should feel that we are blessed.
The other day I tripped and fell down the stairs but God was kind that I did not fracture my leg, but was bruised, toe nail broken, and pain for the subsequent few days. The slightest discomfort that my body underwent brought in quite an amount of unpleasantness to me; I was limping, could not walk fast, and the constant nagging mild pain. It made me realise that had I been a little careful about the faulty staircase I could have avoided all the pain. I should have been a little more alert, but I overlooked it because like millions of others had taken my body for granted, not realising that if I harm it for my own negligence, I should not be cribbing latter. This small incident made me realise that we need to love our body and take care of it before it becomes too late.
The young generation needs to be enlightened on this aspect of live. In a busy street it’s quite a familiar sight seeing youngsters accelerate with speed and enjoy the high for a few seconds, least realising a small mistake in a few seconds could snatch away all the opportunities for enjoying, even small pleasures of life, like taking a stroll, going for a jog, just walking up to the nearby provisional store doing small errands for the home. Not only for self but could engulf many innocent people who have to bear the brunt of somebody else’s negligence. The catastrophe happens because somewhere down the line, we have taken our fit body for granted not caring for it, and not having the desired level of possessiveness for it. We have maimed it ourself for frivolous pleasures of life.
Abusing one’s body is not a rare phenomenon; we human beings abuse it with drugs, alcohol, unhealthy eating habits, leading to obesity, and thus the gateway opens for making the innumerable trips to the hospital, and abruptly cutting short a beautiful life.
The age old saying’ health is wealth’ is so true, but the irony is we give it the least priority, and when we realise that we need to nourish it on a regular day to day basis, for a healthy lifespan, time somewhere has left us far behind.........